Monthly Archives: January 2011

Order. Design. Composition. Tone. Form. Symmetry. Balance.

“You see how I used the Rule of Thirds in this portrait?” I say to the Trainee as I point out how the Subject’s face is under the upper left intersection of where the four grid lines on the monitor cross. “Yeah.” He says doubtfully.   “And that’s good?  Shouldn’t it be centered?” “If we […]

Leading The Class is as Much Fun as Being in The Class

“I want you to give a couple of training classes to the other Photographers.” The Manager/Owner says as he leans back in his chair behind his big desk. “Share some of what you know and how you learned to take such good portraits.” “Ok.” I say. “What would you like me to tell them?” “Whatever […]

The More Things Change

“We’ve got a new set guidelines we want you to follow.” The Manger says with as much enthusiasm as he can muster. “Here are the details.” “Hmm.” I look over the list and I am already doing everything it suggests. “I am already do everything listed here.” “Well, you could do it better.” The world […]

I Never Met A Light I Didn’t Like

“I’ve never seen any of the other Photographers use this many lights.” The Passer says as she looks at the extra light heads I have setting around the Studio. “I like to have a little more control over how my images look.” I say “Well, I can’t see much difference.  Except for the backgrounds.” Some […]

That Dream Job

The slow times of the year are good times to look at what other jobs are out there.  Everyone I work with talks with longing about the good old days of two or three years ago and how they need to find something else to do.  Many of my fellow Assembly Line Portrait workers have […]

So, Where Are You Staying?

“I was at this motel last night.” The New Guy says in a conspirator’s tone. “And it was run by Indians.” “Really?” I say in mock surprise. “Yeah, and not Native Americans, like East India Indians.” He says. “Hmm, don’t travel much, do you?” Just as every town in America has a Chinese family running […]

The Naked Truth

“Any photograph can be improved if you just add a naked woman to it.”  The slightly eccentric Assembly Line Portrait Photographer says. “A car, a cityscape, anything will look better with a naked woman added.” “Hmm.” I say as I try to think of something clever to say.  Not too far away one of the […]

The Room is Too Small

“The PreSeller said this room would be fine.” The Coordinator says as she shows me a room that is little more than a broom closet. “I’m sure he did.” I say as I size up the tiny room with it’s built in cabinets and  low hanging florescent lights. “But I won’t be able to use […]