“I like my pictures to look exactly like the real scene I was looking at.” The Assembly Line Portrait Photographer says as she shows me a picture on her laptop of an alligator. “I don’t like using Photoshop.” “So you mean this alligator was really 13 inches wide and a few millimeters thick and lived …
Author Archives: The Photographer
I Do Know Everything, I Just Don’t Know That
“Your telling me you know how you’re going to pose a group of four when they walk in the door?” My fellow Assembly Line Portrait Photographer says in disbelief. “You use the same pose every time?” “Pretty much so.” I say. The Button Pusher part of the New Company Training was dead easy. So easy …
Training, ReTraining, and ReReTraining
“We had some Passers in a meeting that said flatly they would never become Photographers.” The sort of, but not really anymore, Boss says. “They said they knew it might limit their work potential. Well, duh.” “Yeah, I figure they have about a month left.” I say and shrug. Still hanging in there with The …
Taking Stock and Photographically Speaking
“I don’t think you should be reading that book here.” My Supervisor says when he sees the picture of Buddha on the cover. “It might offend someone.” “Really?” I say and turn the book around so he can read the title which says Confessions of An Atheist Buddhist. “We’re in a Baptist church, how many …
Too Good for The Likes of Us
“I just got the Company newsletter.” I say to my Supervisor. “Don’t you think it’s kind of funny that the Company’s Chairman is too good to have his portrait taken by a Company photographer?” “Yup.” He says with a sage nod. “It’s one of those things that makes you go hmmm.” The New Company sends …
Always Look On The Bright Side
“I don’t think they would have bought us if they weren’t impressed with what we are doing.” The Passer says in our ongoing discussion about The New Company. “Yeah.” I say. “If anything they should be thinking of switching the way they do Directory Promotions to the way we do them.” The only problem with …
